Relays are like the backend servers for Nostr. They allow Nostr clients to send them messages, and they may (or may not) store those messages and broadcast those messages to all other connected clients.
With your own relay running on Nodana you will be able to connect to it from your Nostr client using your connectionUrl
and take control of your messages.
Let us know if there are some config values that you would like to utilise and we can make them available to you. Get in touch over Nostr.